Worn

Do you ever get worn?

Ever feel like a pair of worn jeans?  Jeans get worn just by doing the right thing. Just by being used and being worn all day, every day.  Getting washed at just the right times. Their job is an important one.  They protect our bodies from the elements, take the dirt for us, sustain the injuries, and they do all this, while dealing with carpet burns and coffee stains. 

Do you ever feel like a pair of old jeans?  You take the blunt of injury for others or for your family?  Or take the brunt of the worries on a project.

Do you ever feel like a worn pair of jeans?  You get take all the dirt.  Your day just falls apart, and you are the only one left covered with mud.

Do you ever feel like a worn pair of jeans?  You are just plain old tired.  Tired of doing the same thing over and over and over again.  Wash, wear, repeat.  Wash, wear, repeat.  Are you tired of trying to stand up to the elements?  Tired of standing up to the pressures, decisions and worries of this life?

Do you ever feel like a worn pair of jeans?  Feel like you are staring at carpet burns and coffee stains; things that never go away?  Things that, try as you might, never completely faded?  Problems, people, and issues that never seem to fade?

 

ME.TOO.

 

I want it to stop.  I want the easy way out.  I want to just be done: done being worn, done standing up to the elements, done getting all the dirt on me. I’m done looking at the same ole coffee stains everyday.  I just want to hide back in my corner and be little old me again.  I’m done with the spotlight, I’m done taking the injuries that were meant to hurt others.  I’m done being pointed at.

 

 

HOWEVER… 

Christ is NOT.DONE.

 

This is not about me, this is about HIM.  
This story is not mine. This story is HIS.

 

These things I’m enduring for this moment, they are for other purposes.

Purposes way bigger than I can ever imagine.

 

 

So with tears in my eyes, I keep going.  I send one more email about that issue that started last month.  I call one more person about those plans.  I settle one more fight for my girls.  I whisper that SAME prayer one more time.  I clean up the kitchen one more time.  

I’m still worn, yet I remember the big picture. And the big picture makes more sense than I can ever imagine.

 

My prayers are wearing thin
Yeah, I’m worn
Even before the day begins
Yeah, I’m worn
I’ve lost my will to fight
I’m worn
So, heaven come and flood my eyes

Let me see redemption win
Let me know the struggle ends
That you can mend a heart
That’s frail and torn
I wanna know a song can rise
From the ashes of a broken life
And all that’s dead inside can be reborn
Cause all that’s dead inside will be reborn

“Worn” by Tenth Avenue North